Believing What You Will
by Yazzy
Summary: Rated for character death. When Musica confesses his feelings to Haru, he is rejected. He runs away, and is found by someone who perhaps does not have his best wishes at heart... Yaoi, onesided, HaruMusica. YAOI don't like, don't read.


I don't really watch/read Rave Master (Groove Adventure Rave- I still don't get why there are two sections for the same thing...), but I wrote this for a friend. She says Haru is OOC, so I'll change him if I ever write another one. This is my first attempt at a Rave Master fic, so I'm sorry if it's a bit pants. It's a bit gory as well, that's why it's rated R, but it's nothing REALLY awful. Basically, Musica is in love with Haru, but Haru loves Elie, so Musica runs away. Anyway, I'll stop ruining the plot and give you the story:

Oh, and this story has yaoi themes (Musica loves Haru). If you don't like it, don't read it!

* * *

"Haru?" I walked over behind him and touched his back, making him jump and turn.

"Oh, Musica...sorry, I didn't notice..." He put down his sword. He'd been cleaning it, I could tell. It shone and sparkled in the dim light, casting out sparkles of brightness. I moved a little closer. "Want to know a secret, Haru?" He smiled.

"Sure."

I don't think he was prepared for the secret I told him. At first I didn't say anything, just moved closer still and wound my arms around his waist. He looked at me uneasily and I smiled. "I love you, Haru."

"Uh..." And then I kissed him. And oh, his lips were like fire and ice, burning and freezing and melting me. I pushed him back against the wall of the hut, rubbing myself up against him. But he pulled away, wiping his lips with the back of one hand.

"Musica...I..."

"It's okay if you're scared." I said, eager to reassure him.

"It's not that...it's...Elie. Me and her..." Elie. I should have known. Elie...

"Oh God." I felt like such an idiot.

"Musica..."

"Oh God..." And I ran. I heard him shouting after me, but I suddenly didn't care. I wanted to be as far away from him as my legs could carry me. It sounds stupid- Hedara Musica, leader of the Silver-Rhythm gang, -running away-, but I was just so mortified. Eventually I came to a stop, panting, and burst into tears, leaning against a tree and sliding to the floor. I just felt as if I wanted to die.

"Haru..." I whispered. By then it was dark, and my tears glittered on my cheeks like stars. I sat there curled up into a sobbing heap, wanting nothing more than to disappear. Well they do say you should be careful what you wish for...

I heard a rustling and two men walked out of the trees towards me. "Hey, you! Give us your money!" But I'd left it back with Haru...left it along with everything else I owned...

"I don't have any..."

"You lying to me?" Said the taller of the two, brandishing a knife. I almost wanted him to stab me...

"No..." I whispered.

"Kidding, man, look at your clothes! Where's your money? You better hand it over quick!"

"I don't have any. Kill me." I stood up, ripping open my shirt, exposing my chest. "Kill me." They stared at me like I was mad, and maybe at that moment I was. "Kill me!" They backed away.

"Man, he's crazy!"

"Yeah, lets get out of here!"

They pelted away and I fell to my knees, bowing myself down on the ground and crying. "Musica?" Seconds passed and I heard a voice. "Hedara Musica?" I looked up, and my heart stopped beating. There was a beautiful man standing over me. He was tall and willowy, with blue hair and a kind smile. "Here. It's okay. I heard those people running away. I'll take you back to your friends...I can't really do anything about your wallet, though..."

Wallet? What wallet? I wondered as he pulled me to my feet. "What's your name?"

"Tochi." He bowed slightly. "Your friends are this way." He led me through the dense forest until we came to a clearing.

"Thanks, Tochi. So did you miss me?" I dragged my confidence and suavity back up, although inside I was empty, full of nothing.

"Musica...I..." Haru started. I didn't let him finish- I didn't want to hear.

"Where's Plue?" Plue scampered up on top of a rucksack and waved at me. "Hey mutt."

"Musica..."

"Is there anything to eat? Being robbed really makes you hungry..."

"Musica!" I stopped in the process of opening my bag and straightened up. "Musica...I...I didn't mean..."

"Didn't mean what?" I turned, eyes swimming with tears. "What didn't you mean, rave master?" I found my voice suddenly cold and pitiless. I hated Haru. I hated him for not loving me...and I almost felt as if I hated Elie too, for being the reason -why- he didn't love me. He stuttered for a while and I lost patience. "Are you going to keep stammering or are you going to wish me goodbye?"

"What?" Asked Elie, shocked.

"You heard me." I picked up my stuff and put it in my pockets. "I'm going." I leaned over and gave Haru a quick, rough kiss, then turned and stalked away.

* * *

"You loved him, didn't you?" I spun round, only to find Tochi walking behind me. "You loved him the same way I love you..."

"What?"

"I love you, Musica." He said, coming closer. He smiled shyly. "I really love you. I can't understand how Haru could refuse someone like you...someone so perfect...um..." He blushed. "Sorry. That isn't what you want to hear right now..." I let him come to stand beside me, hope glittering in his eyes. He was a bit younger than me, maybe sixteen or so. At that moment, though, I didn't care. Here was someone who wanted me. Someone who wouldn't object when I-

His lips were so soft and delicate, parting instinctively to let me into his mouth. He practically wound himself around me and we collapsed to the floor, kissing each other desperately. 'Musica, you're acting like a slut!' Yelled a voice in my mind. But I didn't care. I was with someone who wanted this, who wanted me, who was moaning into my mouth, loving what I was doing to them- "AGH!" I yanked myself away from him, and looked down into his eyes. There wasn't any hope or nervousness or love in them any more, only sick, twisted humour. I felt a knife sliding around inside my flesh as he twisted it, and collapsed. He pushed me off him and I fell onto the knife, driving it deeper unintentionally.

"Silly little Musica." No longer was his voice sweet, it was harsh and cold. I gazed up at him and realised that he wasn't as young as I'd thought. I opened my mouth uselessly, then managed to whisper his name. "Haru..." Tochi, as he had called himself, knelt down, turning me over and ripping out the knife then plunging it in once more. I made a croaking noise and struggled weakly as he twisted it again. I could feel it grate against one of my ribs and gave a small scream. I lay there groaning as he walked away. How could I have let someone take advantage of me like that? He must have been sent to kill me...and how easy I'd made it for him to do...

"Musica? Musica! Oh my God, Musica!" I closed my eyes for a second. More pain.

"Haru..."

"Musica! What happened!"

My mind was reeling, and I was fighting to keep my eyes open. "Haru..." I reached out for him and my fingers collided with his wrist. they tightened around it weakly, in a grip he could easily rip himself out of. "Haru..." His name burned my tongue with sweet bitterness. "Haru...I love you..." I coughed and felt something wet graze over my lips. It tasted strangely coppery...was it blood? I coughed again and my mouth filled with something. I felt him tense but he didn't move away as I coughed, spitting what I could only assume to be blood all over myself. "Haru..." I gasped suddenly for air, and felt a pair of lips press gently against my cheek.

I forced my eyes open and saw him looking down at me, tears in his eyes. "I'm sorry Musica...I didn't mean for this to happen..."

"Love you, Haru..." I stiffened as a spasm clenched my whole body and gasped. I could smell blood, could taste blood, could feel blood trickling across my chest, the chest which Tochi had so relentlessly abused...but then... I gave a gurgling chuckle. It was my fault for being such a wanton slut... Haru touched my cheek and burst into tears.

"This is my fault!"

"Not." I protested faintly. "Love you..." My mind was dancing slowly beyond my reach, simple thoughts eluding me. Who was I? What was I doing on the floor? What was floor? There was only one thought still there as I drifted away. "Haru..."

* * *

"Musica? Musica?" Haru shook Musica, panicking. Musica didn't respond, only laid there, silent and unresponsive. Haru put his arms under Musica's back and lifted him, but Musica just lolled there, head back, mouth open, still dribbling blood. "Did you care for him after all that?" Tochi appeared from the trees.

"You're the one who brought him back..." Hissed Haru, suspicious.

"I'm the one who stabbed him -in- the back. Well, in the front, but you'll appreciate the phrase."

"You!"

"Aww, what're you going to do about it? Are you going to pull out a knife and stab me too?" Haru growled at his mocking tone. This was the man who'd killed Musica. This was the man who'd taken the life of one of his best friends. "I'm not, no." He replied. "I'm going to whip out a sword and hack you to pieces!" His blood sang with adrenalin and he hefted his sword. It was still shining as it had been before Musica had come to him.

He was so angry. He had wanted to talk to Musica, to ask him, to explain, to find out if Musica could be what he wanted. But now Musica was gone. And this was the man who had taken him.

* * *

"Musica..." Haru looked down at the gravestone sadly. A tear meandered down his cheek and dripped onto the stone.

'Hedara Musica,

Faithful friend.

You will be missed.

R.I.P'

And Haru broke down and wept. He wept for the injustice of it all, for the betrayal of his friend, for the sadness he felt at losing Musica and his confidence and humour, but most of all, for the opportunity lost- for the fact that now he would never know how he really felt about Musica, how he could have felt about the young leader of the Silver Rhythm gang. Hedara Musica.

He knelt down and touched the letters of the name, one by one. "Goodbye Musica..."

fin

* * *

Sorry if that was really OOC, but like I explained I know precious little about the anime/manga. R&R, but if you're gonna flame because it's yaoi, don't bother. There was a clear warning, and if you didn't know what yaoi was before you read this, it's not my fault. Also, no flames for OOCness- I already explained about that. 


End file.
